Image other see..

We live in a cruel world as many people were saying...

Everyone was trying to live to meet the expectation of others.

Like the perfect body shape to attracts other people.

A beautiful face so that people likes you more.

Money to spend others so they don't think you're frugal.

......

I used to think, that one day someone special will see the beauty of inner me rather than the outside look I shown. I have transformed once to truly show the inner me by dressing what i like after an old friend told me don't care about what other people think of me. But I think i took it too far as i showed too much of me. I dyed my hair pink and blue. I wear my own kind of fashion that people think i'm crazy and some even pass me by and say 'crazy!'. I wanna have chameleon as pet and end up having an iguana, which people think a kind of pet a girl normally shouldn't have that time. I am just being me. Then I started to hear gossip that a close guy fren of mine that time was saying i'm trying to act cute..it was all pretense. Hello! I am 18 that time...it is against law being cute? fyi, i am not acting! Do really I need to live a certain image to let other people be more happy? As time past, I become more indulge in food and tone down myself just to fit the other normal people. Then i end up being a fat, unhappy me. My cousin jess asked me, what happened to my colourful cousin sis, where is she? I just feel that she's lost in somewhere at that moment.

Now, do i even need to look like super hot sexy model going downstair to throw rubbish? I learned that people only look at your outside image first before they decide to get to know you. I still think it's vague to judge people by the cover, but saying this also knowing..we don't have the time to totally read all the book's inner story so we still choose by looking outside first unless recommended by others. So, yes..i think i need to present a more subtle but still very me in bits and pieces here and there. I still think I don't need to change for anyone but myself because I want to get to know more people in this world. I want to attract friends and people so that they will take more interest in knowing the real me.

For those friends that stayed with me in my life journey and bonding strong. Thank you very much for your loving support and care. I seek our relationship continue stronger than ever. For new friends that i will meet, i welcome you to my life and hope to share journey together.

Thanks again for those people that love me, the real me.